Portion Control

I like how Jesus tells us to live as if He is enough.

So why does it seem like He isn't sometimes?

This morning I woke up with a song in my head, as I often do. It was "Healer" by Kari Jobe.

I believe . . . You're my Healer

I believe . . . You are all I need

I believe . . . You're my Portion

I believe . . . You're more than enough for me

Jesus You're all I need.

And the part that struck me anew was the part about Him being my Portion. A portion is what you have on you plate. The measure you consume that sustains you for now. In the Bible it also implies the land you posses or your inheritance. So it's what you have for today and what is yours for tomorrow.

What if all I had was Him?

To breathe. To consume. To own. To keep. To lie down in. To drink from. To have.

Only Him.

Would I complain? What would I do?

For many believers around the world, Jesus is all they have. They have so much of Him, and not much, if anything else. These people know what it is to say, as Jeremiah did, "I say to myself, the LORD is my portion, therefore I will wait for Him." (NIV)

I also like it in the Message: "I'm sticking with God . . . He's all I've got."

Today I have a new line. It's a life-changer, I think. "You are my Portion."

"Oh, Jesus - if you don't fix this, I choose to be thankful because I have You, and You are my Portion."

"Lord, I need that, but if I don't get it, I still have You. You are my Portion."

"God I'm believing you for miracles. But if not - You alone are my Portion."

He will be enough for today. Enough for tomorrow. Enough for forever.

Jesus You are my Portion.

Does it count?

I've had some big questions for God in my life. Why? Why me? Where do you want me? How do I deal with that? What do you expect of me? What do you want from me? How can I do what counts? What does count in your eyes, anyway?
Sometimes I find the answers and sometimes I don't. And it's not like He's not always answering. But sometimes I'm not listening. Or I'm not watching. Or I don't wait long enough. Or I talk over Him. But recently I've been asking that last one a lot. And one of my favorite things in life is when I ask God a question, and then I read the answer when I open the Bible. It never gets old. So check out this black and white:
"The only thing that counts is faith expressing itself through love."-Galatians 5:6 (NIV)
Yeah. Thanks, Jesus. I read you loud and clear.
I don't have to ask how to do that any more. Not only have I received that from others, I've had over fifteen years of practice doing that. And not that I've perfected it, but I do know it. So now that I know WHAT counts and HOW to do it, the matter is in the doing. And not just today or yesterday, but faith expressed through love tomorrow and next week and next year and until I die. Faith expressed through love to him and her and them and the lost and the flock and broken and those who want it and those who don't. When it benefits me and when it hurts me. When I'm filled and when I'm empty. Faith expressed through love. Loving words and loving actions backing them up. Love unconditional and love regardless. For the lovable and even more for the unlovable. For now and for the future and for eternity.
It's the only thing that does count.

open hands

I open my hands

Lift them high to you

Worship, Surrender, Desire

More of You

Less of me

Fill these hands

Fill this heart

Overflowing

Overcome

Now pour me out

Empty my hands

Help me to give

Unashamed, unafraid, unselfish

Humble, "it's not me, but Him"

I poured it out

only those hands were closed

and now

it's all over the ground

Your precious Gift

and how is that not a waste?

How do I try again?

Why should I, anyway?

His answer a jagged pill . . .

medicine nonetheless -

satisfaction, satiation comes in obedience

your food to do My will

consume and be satisfied in Me

you don't choose for them

I have more where that came from

open your hands again.

I am hungry and afraid

But, (sigh)

If you say so, I will

Here are my open hands, Father

Fill me again